a provocatively gracious relationship

This has something to do with the relationship between "a young pastor" and "a church."  For the time being, I'll allow this post to remain anonymous in regards to the particular people involved.  :)

I wrote this because it's a personal challenge that seems to surface again and again and again.  If I'm honest, sometimes I don't want to remember parts of what I'm about to say.  It's too challenging.  It's too convicting.  It even messes with my ego.  Nonetheless, every once in a great while I get a glimpse of what humility looks like.  When I do, I want to write it down as fast as I can so I can remember it later after I forget.








There are several challenging aspects in following a young pastor and also in being a young pastor. Having to communicate and lead a mass of people who have more life experience, further education, better leadership qualities, and who are more emotionally stable is quite a conundrum for many young pastors.  Likewise, having to listen and be led by a young leader who has less life experience, less education, less leadership exposure, and less emotional maturity is quite a conundrum for many faith communities.    

It's not like any of that is a secret, though.  Big deal, right?    

Of course it's a challenge to be a young pastor.  Of course it's challenging for a faith community to follow the lead of a young pastor.  I could have told you that before I became a pastor.  

What I couldn't have told you was what those challenges may have specifically looked like.  Although there are many challenges, below is a particular challenge that I've become more and more aware of.  

An incredible challenge in being a young pastor is the responsibility of teaching what isn't yet “known.” I don't mean "known" from an intellectual standpoint; rather from a life experience standpoint.  Young pastors haven't "known" life in the same way that older people in the faith community have "known" life.  It may seem easy to stand up and share theological bullet points with people; it's a much different ballgame when you realize that because of your age and experience, you haven't really come to “know” what you're talking about in the same way others have - yet you have to teach/preach anyways.

Intellectual theology and experiencing theology are two different worlds. When a young pastor has to teach theology with the recognition that much of his or her audience attains more experience in that same theology; that is a humbling realization.  


And this realization makes the light bulb come on in regards to two truths...

Young pastors must generously give grace to their faith community.  

Although this may be true, there is something else that is true also.  

There are two sides to the coin.

Young pastors must generously receive grace from their faith community.  

However ahead one may think they are on their intellectual theology, they are often far behind in their experiential theology. 

It goes both ways.  

A young pastor having to give grace is hard enough

but a young pastor having to receive grace is even harder.  
And that's the sort of thing that messes with your ego.  

So the voice of ego asks,
"Aren't they the ones that need my grace?"
"Why do I need grace from them?"


And the voice of humility replies,
"Joel, you aren't the superhero you thought you were."
"You're the one that requires the most grace of all."

Living in the tension between intellectual theology and experiential theology is provocative for all parties involved. Yet, somehow and somewhere in that place among that tension, the giving and receiving of grace generates and demonstrates Christ's community.  To put it another way, as the young pastor extends grace in the faith community's slow intellectual growth, the faith community must also extend grace to the young pastor's slow experiential growth.

Growth happens together.

A responsibility for the young pastor is to faithfully teach what isn't yet experienced - “known.” It takes giving grace and receiving grace. It takes pride and humility.  It takes intellect and experience. It takes leadership and servantship. Following a young pastor is incredibly hard. Being a young pastor is incredibly hard.

Success in the giving and receiving of grace is miraculous.
That is where growth happens.
Growth happens together.  

Creating Spaces for Solitude

Create spaces for solitude.

There have been these deafening voices in my head lately (isn't that the way to start out a post?).

Have I mentioned how loud they are?  The voices come from television, movies, music, Facebook, emails, books, magazines, blogs, seminary discussions and papers, work expectations, people's opinions, family, friends, text messages, billboards, radio, ministry partners, and we could sit here and continue this list much longer if we wanted…  Help, they're so loud!  These voices aren't always external either.  Sometimes, they can come from my hands and sometimes from my head - doing and thinking.

It seems there are millions of voices attempting to define reality.  Each one has a different angle, agenda, or approach.  Some of them are incredibly good voices to listen to and some of them are simply time consuming.  But sometimes, when these voices become so deafening, nothing else is able to be heard.

I've always thought it was interesting that each Gospels account (in the Bible: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John) give significant attention to Jesus' habit of "often going to lonely places."  And even more, in the Gospel of Mark, which is by far the shortest account of Jesus' story, there are at least sixteen times where this idea is found.  It seems that the idea of solitude or "going away to lonely places" is one that deserves our attention.

When writing on the topic of solitude, Anne Lindbergh said, "We have so little faith in the ebb and flow of life, of love, of relationship.  We leap at the flow of the tide and resist in terror of its ebb."

Also writing on solitude, Thomas Kempis said, "In quiet and silence the faithful soul makes progress, the hidden meanings of the Scriptures become clear…as one learns to grow still, he draws closer to the Creator and farther from the hurly-burly of the world.  The person who wants to arrive at spirituality has to leave the crowd behind and spend some time with their Creator."

The busyness of life can often creep in and take these moments of stillness away if you aren't careful.  When the flows of life are so plentiful, when the tide is continually in and there's so many "things" to do, it's incredibly easy to see success and accomplishment more virtuous than solitude and stillness.  When the voices become so plentiful, how do you know which ones to listen to?  When the flows take over, you might want to ask yourself which voices you're allowing to define your reality.  Life needs the flows, but it ALSO needs the ebbs.  Life needs moments of solitude, silence, stillness, where you can be at peace with yourself and God.  Life needs The Voice to define reality in the moments of solitude.

Stopping and sitting in solitude allows my heart to hear.  It's harder to hear with my heart than it is my head or hands.  Sometimes, the blaring voices of my head and hands drowned out any chance of ever hearing with my heart.  I need solitude, silence, and stillness - to listen with my heart and allow God to define my reality.  I trust that!  I have faith in that!  I somehow place my hope there!  It's that voice I'll listen to.  Among all the other voices, I'll be attentive to that one.

When my heart is healthy, I'll have a healthy head and healthy hands.  When my heart is made healthy in the ebbs of low tide, the flows of high tide will be that much better.

So this week, I've been intentional about stopping in the middle of my work, and going for a walk to connect with the Voice that that I hear best when everything else is shut up.  Somebody recently told me that I could do the same sort of thing through a 14 second prayer; I disagree.  Being intentional about this requires time and sacrifice.  It requires me to clearly recognize stillness and solitude as virtuous.

It's been beautiful.  It's been rejuvenating.  It's been all that I could ask for, and more.  And little by little, I see why Jesus did what He did when the flows of life never ceased and the voices became too loud.  He intentionally sought solitude, stillness, and silence.

There's something there…something about that...something special…

We need the ebbs and flows.

Preaching and Smiling

Christ told his disciples to "Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation."  From day one of the church's movement until now, preaching the good news has been a staple for every believer in the Christian faith.  

As followers of Christ, we are called to...

Preach.  Proclaim.  Share.  Express.  Articulate.  Whisper.  Serve.  Declare.  Announce.  Demonstrate.  Manifest.  

I like how St. Francis of Assisi said it when he said, "Preach the gospel at all times, and when necessary, use words."  Although St. Francis has been referred to as a "preacher," he advocated that people preach through other methods than mere public speaking.

Some Christians are called to preach among the church, but all are called to preach apart from the church.  Some people preach quietly while others preach loudly.  Some depend more on speaking while others depend more on writing.  Preaching takes on many forms, but all Christians are called to participate in preaching the good news to all of creation.

More on this, but first I want to talk about smiling…

[ Love to Smile]

This week, I had one of my front teeth extracted.  It wasn't fun and still isn't.

When I was about 19, I had my front right tooth knocked in while playing basketball.  Soon after, I had to have a root canal and a crown put in.  Recently at a routine dentist appointment, X-rays showed that the root of this front tooth was deteriorating.  The dentist referred me to the local oral surgery practice as to schedule an implant.  This past week, they pulled out my front tooth and implanted a titanium post.

The oral surgery took place four days ago and because of swelling, I've been unable to use my retainer and its replacement tooth.  

I've always loved to smile, but in the past four days, I've become insecure and self conscious about what my smile has become.  The missing tooth is extremely visible.  People can't not notice when they talk to me.

Smiling is a powerful thing that I often take for granted.

There's something fascinating about "the smile" - a language that everyone speaks regardless of where they're from.  The smile is a expression of…

joy, 

happiness, 

humor, 

kindness, 

fun, 

love, 

and if we're honest, it can also be used as a tool of 

deceit or manipulation.

People always told me they thought my smile was contagious.  In other words, they've said, "your smile speaks a language that I understand."  And I've come to know the truth of this over the years.  I've used the smile to bring hope and happiness to people who needed it.  I've used my smile to tell friends and family that everything will be OK.  I've used the language of the smile quite heavily throughout my years in ministry and I've benefitted greatly from other people's smiles as well.

Mother Theresa seemed to know this as a minister to the sick and dying in Calcutta, India.  She used to say things like:

• "Peace begins with a smile."
• "Let us make one point, that we meet each other with a smile, when it is difficult to smile."
• "Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love."
• "Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing."
• "We shall never know all the good that a simply smile can do."

Emily Dickinson also seemed to recognize the significance of the smile when she said, "They might not need me; but they might.  I'll let my head be just in sight; a smile as small as mine might be precisely their necessity."

Lately, I feel like I haven't been able to effectively speak the language of the smile.

What do you do when you think your smile is broken?

When your smile is broken and people don't respond like they used to, what then?  I used to smile and receive a smile in response; now it seems as if people respond with concern.  It's not a bad thing, it's just a different thing.  I've been told that I notice more than anyone else, but when my social life has a significant change because of a missing front tooth, yes, I agree that I probably do notice it more than others.  Honestly, it's made me quite insecure and self conscious.

Lately, I've stopped smiling.  I've tried to cover up what was broken.
Should I stop smiling?

Because my smile isn't what I think it should be, I've tried to hide my missing tooth.  I didn't want people to see my smile.  I didn't want to get attention in such a humiliating way.  I've felt so inadequate.

But, I didn't stop smiling.  I refuse to let insecurity oppress joy.  I'll smile more, even if I only have one front tooth.  I even preached with one front tooth.  Yes, I was insecure, but I won't stop smiling or preaching.

I want to go back to talking about preaching again...

[Back to Preaching]

I've wanted to stop sharing the good news taught by Jesus because I've felt that I wasn't adequate as a communicator.  Sometimes I think my "preaching" is broken and, like my smile, I've wanted to quite all together.

I know a bunch of other people as well that don't preach, teach, share their faith, or talk about Jesus because they don't think they're qualified or somehow good enough.  They feel like something is broken, so they stop.  But should they stop?  Should I stop smiling just because I feel like my smile is broken?

However you share Christ to people, do it.  Don't stop.  And if you feel like you're somehow inadequate, trust God to give you the words, the motives, the heart, and the attitude to continue.  Keep peaching the Gospel at all times, and when it's necessary, use words to do it.

Preaching is a powerful thing.  Your preaching may put the message of Christ in a language understandable to those around you.  Some people may never truly know about the power and legitimacy of the Gospel if you don't take the opportunity to preach it.  The people around you may be waiting for you.  You might be the method God uses to speak to that person, if you would just preach.  And when people don't respond how you want them to or how you think they should, preach anyways.  Preach when people want to hear it, but also when people don't want to hear it.  Preach and proclaim the Gospel, the immense love and work of God, even when you think you're not that good at it.  Keep preaching.

Whatever art or method your preaching takes on, keep doing it.

Don't let your insecurity stop you from preaching…  God's strength is made known in your weakness.

Let's keep preaching the good news to all creation.